Cos this would be the BEST birthday cake ever!!
It looked SO real I had to do a double take.

They’ve got one great baker up at the Kenmore QFC…
The fries look so real, don’t they?!?!?!

]]> http://jordinsilver.com/2010/07/20/im-sad-my-birthday-already-happened/feed/ 0 http://jordinsilver.com/2010/07/19/words-of-wisdom-from-my-gf/ http://jordinsilver.com/2010/07/19/words-of-wisdom-from-my-gf/#comments Tue, 20 Jul 2010 04:59:44 +0000 Jordin Silver http://jordinsilver.com/?p=1508 (ps-she picked out this photo!)

*My girlfriend and I were having a conversation about me going to get ice cream by myself…*

MY GF: I know you go get ice cream by yourself all the time. I find those cups in the trash. I can’t believe you.
ME: I can go out to eat by myself….I can go get ice cream by myself….I can do whatever the f*** I want, by myself.
MY GF: How about go to the gym by yourself??

Could someone please tell me what Justin Bieber was doing out front of my Liquor Store on 12th & Pine?
His jeans are TERRIBLE!

I thought this was pretty funny….
What the hell do you think those bumper stickers say??
They really could say anything….

While the full-timers were on vacation I did a random shift at The End.
Here are a few breaks all mashed together

On Tuesday I was looking at things on Craigslist, and came across a listing where an Antique Shop Owner had just died. Everything in his shop was being sold super cheap. So I hopped in my car, drove all the way down to Burien, and entered the store.

When I was on my knees digging through a pile of stuff in the corner, the guy who was running the store said to me, ‘If you wanna dig, I have tons of stuff out back that isn’t even on the floor yet!’

I got a super huge rush. I felt like I was an ‘American Picker!’ So I went out back and rummaged through everything. Finding old cameras, navy bags, flashlights, ect.

The owner then came out back, and we got to talking. I asked him if he needed help listing things on eBay. He told me he was JUST about to put an ad out on Craigslist for someone to do just that. So we talked more, and he told me to come to his ‘warehouse’ the next morning at 9am.

I was so excited! I went home and bought a new notebook and pen. Finally gonna be off Unemployment. Went to bed early, got up early, and made it to his ‘warehouse’ ten minutes early.

Well…his warehouse was his garage. Granted, it was nice, but it was a little creepy. He had to run and do something, so his wife was the one who was supposed to tell me how everything was going to go.

She told me my rate of pay would be 10% of what I sold on eBay for them. No hourly wage. (even though he said something about an hourly wage the day before). The wife went to go get ready, and invited me to go through the ‘warehouse’ and see what kind of stuff they had.

Junk… it was all junk. I looked stuff up as I was going through it. He didn’t have the eye that someone would need if they actually wanted to make money in this business.

She came back and told me they wanted me to go with them to the Antique Store, and find the ‘high value items’ in the store, so they can bring them home and sell them on ebay.

So I did…. But they really just had junk……
I then said to them, ‘Well, since I won’t be able to list anything today, I think it would be fair if you gave me an hourly wage, otherwise I would be doing this labor for nothing.’ The woman consulted with her husband and they decided they would give me $10/hr but only for a few hours and ONLY for today…..Otherwise it would be 10 percent of what I sold..

They also told me I would sell their stuff off MY ebay account and use MY paypal account. (Which I am thinking was a way for them to skip taxes).

So I hung around for an hour, doing what they wanted me to…and then I went to lunch, and never came back.

With this job, I could have worked 5 days a week for 8 hours and still NOT MADE A DIME, because their products were CRAP…. If I saw $10,000 items, I would have jumped on this in a second….but the stuff I was looking up was near worthless.. It was the kind of stuff that someone without an ‘eye’ would buy, thinking it looked old and cool, but never researching the market and mark-up before they purchased it!!

So…back to the unemployment drawing board for me.

Someone give me a god damn radio job.

This is what my life is like now…
Working for a random group of scam-artists is what I have been reduced to….

CONTESTANT: I’ll take stores for $1000 Alex

ALEX TREBEK: Answer…..The only store where you are expected to use a HOLE IN THE WALL
to hang your clothes in the dressing room?

CONTESTANT: What is, Goodwill?

ALEX TREBEK: Correct!

You ain’t gonna see this ‘ish’ at Nemian Markis, fo sho!

Take a look at the picture above… See the circle things? They are supposed to have a belt (black rubber bandy thing) on them…

Saturday my good friend Danni and I went ‘Estate Salin’. I was supposed to drive, but since it was raining, she did. And thank god she did. When I was one stoplight away from my house, my car made this horrible screeching noise, then the power steering went out AND the battery light went on.

BY THE GRACE OF ‘GOD’ somehow I was able to coast it right into a legal spot, and turn it off…. I walked back to where the noise happened, and laying in the street are THESE two f***ing things:

I broke on of the ‘Belts’ on my car…..And the other one popped off….
AND MY AWESOME MECHANIC FRIEND IS ON VACATION FOR 4 YEARS… (YES……YEARS)
So now what do I do? Call my dad….find out what the HELL those things are, take the bus into the ghetto to get two new belts, and then post on Craigslist and ask if ANYONE can fix it for me.

First guy that came was named Jerry. Cool guy that reminded me of Christopher (my mechanic). But he didn’t have the right tool. So I ran around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to get him a wrench. Called a friend, and had my girlfriend knock on EVERY DOOR AT THE CHLOE APARTMENT to find someone who had the right tool.

When we got it finally, it was too dark. So ‘Jerry’ put one belt on, and then had to go. I paid him $30 cos he said he would come back the next day and put the other one on for me.

The next day, he never came… I am a fool….

So I get back on Craigslist….And get two guys who say they’ll come by 11…Both never do….one emails me that he’ll be here at noon…that never happens..

So I answer ONE MORE email (I got tons) from this guy sayin he’s ‘55 and not a flake’… ‘been doing this for many years!’ So I have him come out..

He was the COOLEST DUDE…. He told me all these great stories of his life, while he fixed my car…..And he REALLY fixed it.. He told me everything he was doing, and had me test it.. Also he checked all my ‘fluids’ and we put air in my tires..

On my birthday I won $90 at a casino.. I was 1 number away from winning $1599…….
It ended up costing me $100 to get my car fixed….
My whole life I can never get ahead…just knocked back any time I am ahead…
I guess I should feel lucky that I didn’t win the $1599 jackpot..
Cos then $1599 worth of damage would have happened to my car..
At least that is the way I see it…

(look at my dirty ass ANGRY hands!)

Yeah I always say that. I do mean it. I have been really busy, if you can believe it.
I had a birthday. I still have no job…. Really trying though….Really….

This is from the Hot Dog stand in front of my apartment..
Best hot dog in what????

*at Outback Steakhouse with  my girlfriend. We hadn’t been before*
ME: Oh my god!! Can I PLEASE order in an Australian Accent????
MY GF: Oh my god!! Can you PLEASE NOT order in an Australian Accent???